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Fucking Swiss Miss!

Rated PG-13 (ish)

Did I ever tell you about my problem with Swiss Miss?

It’s their god damned tapioca pudding cups. The lids are impossible to remove!!

I’ll get home and be all “Jesus God I need me some tapioca pudding IMMEDIATELY” and I’ll reach into the fridge all hot and bothered for some-a that lumpy goodness. Rip me off a couple cups from the sixer I keep handy (one isn’t enough, ‘course, fuckers are small), open ‘em up and dig in.

Or rather, I’ll TRY to open them up, but be completely stymied by overzealous adhesive application to the lid! I mean, what the fuck is that stuff, epoxy?! And the lids are made of like, something they line the space shuttle with or something, because nothing short of a steak knife applied with a hammer can poke a hole in the god damned things.

I’m going to write a letter, I swear. ANOTHER letter. Fucking Swiss Miss and her sweaty Nordic girl-next-door provocations must be ended. That Tapioca Tart! Bitch!

  1. August 22, 2006 at 5:41 pm | #1

    Please do write this letter. And then post it here.

  2. rob
    August 25, 2006 at 7:56 am | #2

    Yeah, like that’ll happen. John can’t even open a lid, let alone write a letter.

  3. Leesa
    November 15, 2006 at 9:16 am | #3

    I am writing to them today. I cannot remove the damn lids from the butterscotch pudding either. I DO have to use a steak knife to get into the damn pudding! I am glad I’m not the only one who has suffered this while just trying to get a little snack!

  4. Jason
    February 26, 2009 at 6:38 am | #4

    YEAH!!! I have a problem with the butterscotch pudding… I end up getting pissed and just digging down in with two fingers (in a come hither motion) and ripping the lid off and end up with half of the cup on my hand, but at least I wasn’t defeated by some swedish hag’s plastic lid.

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